


Space Mutiny IV

by SoloByChoice



Category: due South
Genre: Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-23
Updated: 2018-09-23
Packaged: 2019-07-16 00:49:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 963
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16074881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SoloByChoice/pseuds/SoloByChoice
Summary: In which Fraser's weird crush on his boss ruins Kowalski's evening plans. Or, why these four characters, of all people, appeared to be leaving a movie together at the beginning of "Say Amen."





	Space Mutiny IV

**Author's Note:**

> Written for a friend I got to watch dS with me and to reference some jokes we made. And a Simpsons reference, of course.

It was Fraser’s fault. “This is your fault, Fraser,” Ray hissed.

“It is not,” Fraser grumbled.

“Is too.”

“Is not.”

“Yeah because I’m the idiot who can’t say no to his boss because of his weird crush on her.”

Fraser coughed. “Keep your voice down, Ray, I’m trying to watch the movie.”

Ray laughed at him.

“Be quiet!” said Thatcher, leaning past Turnbull.

Ray rolled his eyes and sank further down in his seat. Stupid Mounties.

It really was Fraser’s fault. All Ray had wanted was to not go to the movie theater alone like some sort of loser. Taking Fraser to a movie about space aliens shooting space robots wasn’t the best solution to that problem, but unfortunately it was him or Frannie. Knowing Frannie she might assume it was a date and Ray did occasionally remember he was pretending to be her brother, so he didn’t need to deal with that.

Anyway, he’d decided to ask Fraser. Maybe asking him at the consulate had been the mistake.

Fraser leaned over to mutter at him out of the side of his mouth. “For your information, I can say no to her I just... choose... not to, generally.”

Maybe he needed more friends.

Somehow Fraser hadn’t been underfoot at the precinct all day, so Ray had gone to find him addressing envelopes for something or other in his cluttered little office at the consulate. He’d grasped at Ray’s presence like a lifeline that might save him from his tedious job, but then was clearly disappointed when Ray explained why he was there.

“Yeah, yeah, I know you’d rather climb a mountain, but you might surprise yourself and enjoy it.”

“And it’s called _Space Mutiny 4: Robot Mutiny_?” Fraser was making that _I’m not saying anything because I can’t think of anything both nice and honest to say_ face.

“You don’t have to have seen the first three.”

Fraser scraped his thumb across his eyebrow. “Uh, Ray, it’s not that I’m not grateful you thought of me but--”

“Oh, come on, I wanna see this movie and I don’t wanna go alone, okay? There is nothing lamer than going to the movies by yourself, and anyway I do dumb stuff you like all the time!”

Fraser opened his mouth.

“Yeah, I know, you don’t like dumb stuff, blah blah. Remember that time we went camping in Grant Park? Or that time I pretended to be a baseball player? Or that time we almost drowned in Lake Superior chasing a ghost ship? Or that time we wheeled that dead guy about the station all afternoon? Or –“

“Excuse me, Detective Vecchio, but I was listening, um that is, I was walking down the hallway and I couldn’t help over hearing because I would never eavesdrop on your conversations, Constable, even when sometimes I’m not sure who you’re talking to.” It was Turnbull and he was babbling in the doorway of the office. He was also holding a porcelain rooster.

Fraser breathed in through his nose. “What is it, Constable?”

“Ah. Right. Well. Are you looking for someone to see _Space Mutiny 4: Robot Mutiny_ with? Because I very much enjoyed the previous films. I thought they were an interesting commentary on the conflict between American exceptionalism and your fear of the future.”

“They’re just stupid movies about hot people in space shooting aliens with lasers. Anyway, uh, Fraser’s going with me, right, Frase?”

Fraser, the traitor, started fussing with a pile of random papers on his desk. “Well, you know, Ray, I do have a lot of work to do.”

“But you were just saying earlier this afternoon how bored you were, remember?” said Turnbull helpfully.

Fraser glared at him. “It must have all come up since then.”

Ray felt that the prospect of going to the movies with Turnbull was a much worse fate than going alone. He had just about decided to forget the entire thing and leave, when Thatcher appeared in the doorway behind Turnbull. Ray experienced a couple extra seconds of ignorance that his afternoon was about to be ruined before she spoke, alerting them all to her presence.

“What are you doing here, Vecchio?”

Ray and Turnbull both spun around, Turnbull moving out of the doorway so Thatcher could come in, clutching the rooster to his chest. She narrowed her eyes at him with suspicion, but said nothing.

“There’s this case, and I was asking Fraser –“ Ray began, at the exact same moment that Turnbull said, “He was asking me to a movie, sir. Ma’am.”

“No, I wasn’t!”

Thatcher immediately gave up on both of them and turned to Fraser. “Ray wanted to invite me to see a movie,” he confessed. “But I told him I’m busy, unfortunately, as you can see.” He straightened the stack of papers on his desk and smiled at her in what he probably hoped was a charming way.

It seemed to work for a couple seconds, but then Thatcher shook her head as if to clear it and grabbed the papers. She flipped through them. “These are finished.” Fraser slumped down slightly in this chair.

Ray laughed at him, which unfortunately drew Thatcher’s attention. “What’s the movie?”

“Oh, it’s just something stupid,” said Ray, and stepped on Turnbull’s foot before he could say anything.

Thatcher wasn’t listening. “You know, I’ve been thinking I ought to get out more. Experience more genuine American culture, while I’m south of the border. Maybe this is just the thing. You wouldn’t object if I came along, would you, Fraser?” She turned her sharp gaze on him.

And he hadn’t objected, of course.

So this was all Fraser’s fault. Ray slumped in his seat. Next time he wanted to go to the movies, he was just going to go alone. 


End file.
